Blog 5: What did I learn so far?

Time is really elusive. In a blink, it's already April. After the crazy winter chills, here comes the unexpectedly windy Spring. The weather here in Ann Arbor is really unpredictable; likewise, the events that occurred to me when I chose to audit this class and became, for the first time, a conversation circle facilitator. The whole experience has truly been life-changing!

What were my hesitations/questions before? What surprised me so far?

a. Hesitation/Question (Before the start of this course): Should I always talk in the circle? Or should I take more the 'Interviewer' role?

What I learned?

People love talking about themselves. So try to think of ways that will encourage the participants to talk more about their interests, their views, and their feelings. And when they are talking, LISTEN INTENTLY. Listen as a friend, not as a conversation leader. For sure, these International students, who may be here for the first time, who may or may not have enough friends, will appreciate someone whom they think will be able to GENUINELY listen to them. And once you find them opening up about themselves, that's when you realize that it is easier to talk about stuff - from silly to nerdy topics.

b. Hesitation/Question (Before the start of this course): I am a non-native speaker of English, myself. Should I fear that they underestimate me (my accent, etc.)?

What did I learn?

To be an effective conversation circle facilitator, one does not need to be a native speaker of English. One important thing I realized from this experience is that an effective facilitator is one who empathizes well with the participants - one who listens, one who understands because he listened, and one who cares because he understood.

c. Hesitation/Question (Before the start of this course): If I talk about cultural differences (i.e. American culture versus Asian culture), would I launch issues that would be very offensive?

What did I learn?

Culture is a VERY interesting topic for any discussion. In fact, I found that when you brought up a single topic - table manners, customer service, greetings, ways of cooking, and the like - people love to compare and contrast. And when the contrast is so apparent, that's when the conversation gets too intense. Some minor disagreements may get in the way, but that's where the beauty of conversation is!

Before, I was so worried about bringing up cultural topics. But now, I learned that culture is so ingrained in people, so bank on that. They love to talk about what they are practicing and they love to compare the practices they are accustomed to having and do to people who do things differently.

I know that in the next few weeks, I will still be learning a lot from this unique journey as a conversation facilitator, and I am looking forward to every lesson I can bring home to.